This is the eighth post in a multi-part series where I share the highlights of the sections/subsections of the book How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie.
Six Ways to Make People Like You
Principle 5: Talk in terms of the other person’s interests
- The royal road to a person’s heart it to talk about the things he/she treasures most.
- A salesman from Duvernoy and Sons, a New York wholesale bakery, had tried everything to sell to the manager of a hotel. He worked on the manager for nearly four years, and even stayed in the hotel several times to prove himself. The salesman found out the manager was part of the Hotel Greeters of America, so he attended several meetings and learned more about the organization. The manager saw the salesman’s efforts to learn more about his interests and ended up giving him the business.
- A soldier returned home but was having some trouble finding work, as most of the jobs in the small town were available through a gentleman who was notoriously difficult to get interviews with. The soldier learned more about the manager’s secretary — her interests and eventually the manager’s interests — so that he could get himself on the calendar for an interview.
- “Talking in terms of the other person’s interests pays off for both parties. Howard Z. Herzig, a leader in the field of employee communications, has always followed this principle. When asked what reward he got from it, Mr. Herzig responded that he not only received a different reward from each person but that in general the reward had been an enlargement of his life each time he spoke to someone.”
Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.