This is the twenty-fifth post in a multi-part series where I share the highlights of the sections/subsections of the book How to Win Friends & Influence People by Dale Carnegie.
Be a Leader: How to Change People without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment
Principle 4: Ask questions instead of giving direct orders
- Use suggestions rather than orders; “maybe if we were to phrase it this way, it would be better.”
- Give people the opportunity to do things themselves rather than ordering them; it saves a person’s pride and gives him a sense of importance and encourages cooperation instead of rebellion.
- Resentment caused by a brash order can last a long time.
- Asking questions not only makes the request more palatable, it stimulates the creativity of the persons who you ask.
- People are more likely to accept an order if they’ve had a part in the decision that caused the order to be issued.
Let the other person save face.